Friday, March 13, 2015

Weird chips from England


I recently went on a vacation to the Caribbean which was a very welcomed climate change as the weather in Rhode Island this February has been filled with way too much snow. We took a cruise ship down there and stopped at four islands: San Juan - Puerto Rico, St. Thomas - U.S. Virgin Island, St. Martin - Dutch and French property, and Tortola - British Virgin Island. I'm not much of a beach person so my goal at each island was to find some unique shops that properly represented the island and/or country that owned said island. With San Juan and St. Thomas being American properties, I got what I expected there, plenty of commercial stores and restaurant chains, so not a lot of shopping took place at either island. St. Martin was what I was most excited for as it is shared by both the French and the Dutch so my imagination ran with stores full of wooden shoes and cheese. Sadly, none of this was found. There were plenty of tacky souvenirs, jewelry and booze. That's it.

At this point, I'm sure your thinking, "Matt, what does any of this have to do with chips from England?". Well internet, I'll tell you. The final island we visited was Tortola. I had heard that there weren't a ton of shops available here as it is one of the newer stops added to these cruise tours so my expectations were very low on finding anything special. Once we got to the island, I was happy to see that there were a good amount of options and they were all small mom and pop shops. Not long after we walk into town, we saw a sign pointing us to a place that sold "foods from England". We followed the sign and found a tiny hole-in-the-wall place chock full of exactly what they claimed and I couldn't have been happier. This is the kind of place I was looking for all along. There were shelves filled with every type of food and beverage you could think of. After a few minutes of wandering around this magical place, I found the holy grail, the snack aisle. This is where I found a wall full of cases of small bags of chips all with flavors I've never seen before. I began trying to decide which flavors to try when my wife Nichole said four magical words: "just get them all". I did.

Now let's get to talking about chips! All of the flavors that I purchased are from the Walkers crisp company. If you'll notice below, the logo looks identical to our all familiar Lays logo and for good reason. Walkers was founded in 1948 in Leicester, England by Harry Walker, and acquired by Frito-Lay in 1989. Learning that made me wonder even more why these flavors aren't available in the U.S.
Here we go, in the order of how I tried them, 8 weird chip flavors, or crisps as they call them, from England:

Monster Munch roast beef: Monster Munch is a baked corn snack made by Walkers that is in the shape of what I assume is supposed to be a monster hand but resembles a catchers mitt more than anything. I did really like the texture, similar to a cheese puff but without the orange finger aftermath. As for the flavor, I liked that as well. I don't know that I would say it truly tastes like roast beef, more like the seasoning that would be on the meat, giving it a beef-ish flavor. Overall, very enjoyable and I could see American snackers munching these up no problem.

Monster Munch pickled onion: I have never had a pickled onion before so I didn't really know what to expect here. I like sour cream and onion chips and fuyuns so I figured it would be in the ball park of those flavors. Nope. According to a friend who tried these with me and does enjoy pickled onions, they are spot on, further solidifying that I will continue to live my life pickled onion free. Yuck.

Now to the normal potato chips, um, crisps. 

 Unmistakably cheese & onion with cheddar from Somerset: This was a fairly tame chip with subtle hints of both cheddar and onion that was good start to these unique flavors. We don't often see cheese and onion as stand alone flavors in the U.S. which I assume is why we don't see this option on our shelves. If you do happen to see it pop up somewhere, don't be afraid, it's not bad at all.

Undeniably picked onion with real British vinegar: After trying the Monster Munch of the same flavor, I certainly wasn't excited for this one, but I gave it a shot just for you internet. Expecting an identical flavor as the Monster Munch, I was quickly punched in the face with pure vinegar at first bite. Wow was that strong. I like salt and vinegar chips but this was very overpowering. After recovering for a minute, I went back once again just for you. Once the vinegar flavor died down, the pickled onion flavor squeezed in at the end, making for an overall awful chip. Double yuck.

Simply roast chicken with free range chicken from Devon: These chips taste like, well, chicken! I was actually surprised as to how much like real chicken they tasted like and not just a bouillon cube which I expected. Turns out actual dried chicken breast was used as an ingredient. Whodathunkit! I can see this one going over very well in the U.S., so get on it Lays!

Famously worcester sauce blended in Britain: I'm not one to chug straight bottles of worcester sauce so placing this flavor was a little tricky for me. It did seem a bit sweeter than I thought it should but I could be totally wrong about that. I could see this being mixed with other flavors rather than a stand alone, but either way, it was interesting.

Scrumptiously smoky bacon with pork from Norfolk: Being a lover of bacon, I was hopeful of this one, but also skeptical as artificially flavored bacon products almost never meet expectations. After seeing that actual dried pork shoulder was used, I felt a little better, but only a little because smoke flavouring was also used, which is often the downfall. Right off the bat I got a BacO's/bacon bits type taste which I definitely contribute to the artificial smoky flavor, but some of the real bacon does come through afterwards. I'd say with some tweaks, like toning down the smoky, this could be a big seller in the states.

 Definitively prawn cocktail with vale of Evesham tomatoes: This one worried me the most. Seafood potato chips? Hmm. I proceeded with caution taking a small bite and was surprised to not get any seafood flavor at all. After inspecting the bag and learning that only prawn cocktail seasoning, among tomato and onions, were used making it taste like nothing more than cocktail sauce. That was actually a relief. I can't really see Americans jumping all over this one, but it wasn't bad.

So there you have it, 8 weird chips from England! If you have any interest in trying these for yourself, they do seem to be easily accessible through a variety of online shops including Amazon. Just search for Walkers crisps. I'm assuming they call them crisps instead of chips because they call french fries chips. Silly England!  

Thursday, January 1, 2015

31 Album Reviews from 2014


Here is the complete list of all 31 reviews. They don't start off in any specific order, but it tends to be the albums I liked least at the top and builds up to a list within a list. my top 10 of 2014. Remember, these are 31 albums I invested time in to, so they aren't all positive reviews! Agree? Disagree? I want to hear what you think!